I Keep Dating Problem People - Now What?
The good news is that you’ve realized your pattern. Many people keep on dating problem people without realizing that’s the reason why they keep getting stuck in unhealthy relationships. Once we understand our behavior and actions, we can start looking for solutions to our problems.
What is defined as ‘problem people’ is rather subjective and can differ from person to person, but certain things are red flags in the dating scene. Let’s take a look at how you can stop dating the wrong people:
Don’t Ignore the Red Flags. Your experience will help you pinpoint these red flags that you’ve previously ignored. Are they keeping secrets, avoiding certain questions or acting in a suspicious way? Trust your gut and get out before you’re love drunk.
Do Introspection. It’s important to understand the reasoning behind your actions. Try and ask yourself exactly why making the bad choices is temporarily making you feel good? It could be that your low self-esteem is leading you to partners that won’t give you the love and respect that you deserve.
Forgive yourself. Don’t be too hard on yourself because you’ve been dating problem people. We all make mistakes and this doesn’t define your worth. Forgive yourself for the past mishaps and let it go.
Don’t Make People Your Projects. Does this sound familiar? Do you find yourself going for those with broken wings only to feel like you’re the broken one at the end? Don’t try and ‘fix’ people in the process of dating, we are all responsible for ourselves and our actions.
Relationships are complicated as it is, and we can all fall into the trap of dating the wrong people. Since this is a complicated topic, I would suggest you chat with a professional such as myself so that we can help you uncover the deeper motivations and help you find the “right” fit partner.